The Ram and the Rabbit: If You Try
by The Alice of Shredd
Summary: Hiro always hated how giddy Momiji acted all the time, as if his cursed life was blessed. But when Hiro takes a wrong turn at the Sohma house, he stumbles across a tearyeyed rabbit who seems to be overwhelmed by the life behind the facade.


**The Ram and the Rabbit: If You Try**

————————

Rated T purely because of… erm… Ayame's implied interpretations…

Another oneshot. And my god, it's bad.

This fanfiction is officially stamped with an 'Implied Yaoi Warning.'

**A/N 1:** Yup, this is a Hiro/Momiji fanfic. Nope, this is not slash. I mean, my _god_, they're just friends (not really even that!), and Hiro _so_ belongs with Kisa.

Wow, I talk too much.

————————

Hiro couldn't stand Momiji. The blond boy, although older than himself, was always so peppy and giggly, and nearly oblivious to anything serious. It was that immaturity that irked Hiro the most.

But everything seemed to change when Hiro took a wrong turn on the Sohma Main Estate and ended up a completely unfamiliar area. He had been preoccupied in staring up at the starry evening sky.

He heard music from his left, coming from an open door beyond a garden. Hiro, entraced by the music, stepped closer, pushing past bushes silently. The music continued—he hadn't been noticed. So he crept up next to the door, peeking into the room.

Standing in the center of the room, facing away from Hiro, was Momji, but his expression wasn't one Hiro has seen before. Momiji seemed deep in through, as if torn between two choices. He stayed there, unmoving, the bow gliding across the violin on its own.

Hiro winced as a screech split the quiet air. Momiji jumped, too, the bow landing softly on the floor, dropped from surprise. The rabbit's eyes were wide, staring down at the strings. Hiro nearly laughed—he seemed shocked that he had been playing in the first place.

But a cloud shifted in the sky, cast a light though the room. It had been dim before, but now Hiro could see that Momiji's eyes were red and moist with tears. He was biting his lip and choking quick breaths in and out.

_What's wrong?_ Hiro wondered, leaning a bit more into the doorway.

The doorframe creaked; Momiji's eyes snapped to Hiro, and he instantly grinned, trying to wipe his cheeks before his tears were noticed. "Hiro!" he laughed, his giddy demeanor the same as ever. "What're you doing here?"

Hiro didn't answer. He stepped into the doorway while Momiji bent to pick up the bow, and then stood silently a good distance away, looking up into his red-rimmed eyes.

"Hiro?" Momiji asked, tilting his head curiously.

"How… how can you…?"

"How can I what?"

Hiro clenched his fists at his sides, suddenly more furious than he expected. "How can you just laugh and smile so easily? Weren't you just crying?"

"No," Momiji answered too quickly. "I-I just had something in my eye…"

"What a lame excuse! What am I, a kindergartener?" Hiro stormed forward. "Why were you crying, anyway?"

"I wasn't—"

"Look, I'm trying to help, and the only thing you can do is deny that you were tearing up over here? Your eyes are all red—it's obvious!"

Momiji shook his head, turning away, slowly putting the violin back into its case. "Hiro, I wasn't crying, really…!"

"Well, I guess it's true," Hiro shrugged, bitingly sarcastic, embarrassed that he made a big deal out of nothing. "I mean, what would _you_ have to cry about? Nothing _ever_ goes wrong in the precious rabbit's life! You just sit around and play music, right? And hug that stupid woman—you all do! It's disgusting, how you all like her so much! I bet that's what keeps you so happy! Or maybe she just takes the place of problems, pushes them aside, until you forget about them! All of you—why can't you face your problems? Are you _scared_? Are you—"

Hiro's voice broke off when Momiji turned back around. His eyes were narrowed, glowing lividly with frustration. But no matter how angry he looked, he couldn't hide the fact that he was shaking, silent, tearless sobs rattling his body. "Just stop it!" he croaked, running both hands over his ears, ruffling his golden hair. "Stop calling her stupid—you don't know what you're saying!"

"Mo—"

"Stop it, Hiro! Go away!"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" he said, giggling again, but spitefully. "Can't you see that I'm perfectly happy? Like you said—nothing _ever_ goes wrong in the precious rabbit's life!"

Hiro flushed, guilt stabbing through his chest. "But—"

"We're all trying—why can't you see that? We're trying to stay happy, trying to ignore the knowledge that we're all just trapped!" Covering his face with his hands, Momiji sank down onto his bed. "Why do you think it's so wrong to like being with someone who makes you happy?"

His light brown eyes flashed up to meet Hiro's. "Aren't you supposed to be leaving?"

Hiro, for the first time in his life, found himself at a loss for words. He simply stood there, watching dumbfounded as Momiji wiped his eyes, trying to keep the sobs at bay. After what seemed like eternity, he finally moved to sit beside the rabbit.

"What's wrong?" he repeated softly. Momiji sent him a hard glare, but he didn't flinch. "What is it, then?" he said.

"I'm trying," the rabbit answered, gulping. "But trying isn't the same as doing."

"I…" Hiro couldn't think of anything to say, even though he wanted to comfort him; to protect him. "I think…" He sighed, looking down at his hands. "I think that trying might not be the same as doing… but what does 'doing' mean? As long as you try… isn't that worth something?"

"No…"

"But… but my mother…" He chuckled. "My mother always says how I'm getting nicer, more caring. I'm really not—I might be trying to, but I can't help it when someone says something deserving of an insult. She says I've tamed my tongue—and it's not a lot, but it's enough…"

Momiji laughed a little. "That sounds like her."

"So…" Hiro raised his eyes back to Momiji's. "As long as you try to do whatever you're doing, even if you don't succeed, it's okay."

"It is?" He hiccupped, and there was a sudden puff of smoke and a rabbit sat next to Hiro. "Oh… I'm sorry…!"

Without thinking, Hiro picked him up and held him against his chest, closing his eyes. They sat there in silence, Momiji sniffing every once in a while. And neither boy seemed to mind.

"Momitchi," Hatori suddenly said from the hall, opening the door. "Have you seen Hi…ro? So that's where you are."

Hiro's eyes snapped open, locking onto Hatori. "What do you want?"

"What happened, Momiji?" Hatori asked, disregarding Hiro's biting reaction.

But just then, another puff of smoke clouded the room, and Hiro yelped as Momiji wrapped his arms around his neck and put his head on Hiro's shoulder. "Nothing happened, Ha'ri," he grinned, wiping a tear away. "I'm fine."

Hatori gave them a skeptical look, sighed, and closed the door behind him when he left. Hiro squirmed in the meantime, trying to avert his eyes from Momiji. The hot touch of Momiji's bare skin made him uneasy.

"Jeez, can't you get dressed?" Hiro groaned after a moment, finally sitting still. But the rabbit didn't answer. "Hey, you—can't you…"

Momiji's slow, quiet breathing and closed eyes seemed to be the perfect portrayal of the word _sleep_. A smile flickered across the ram's face, and then he patting Momiji's back, adjusting himself before he lay back on the bed.

—————

"Hiro-chan?" Kisa asked three days later as the two strolled in the park under the not-so-watchful eye of Hatori, who had fallen asleep on the bench a while back.

"Yeah?"

"Will you tell me something?" She squeezed his hand, stopping to look at him fully.

"Sure—what's up?"

"I…" Her face flushed, and she pulled something from her pocket. "I found this yesterday, lying on the sidewalk… I asked Ayame Oji-chan about it, and…"

It was a picture, it seemed. With a closer look, Hiro choked on his own breath. It was picture of him from three nights ago, sleeping on the bed with the naked body of Momiji sprawled next to him. From the angle the picture taken, it wasn't revealing, but extremely incriminating.

"And he said to ask you what sort of fun things you were doing." She tilted her head to the side. "Hiro-chan, m-may I join your fun next time?"

He couldn't do anything but gape at her. "No," he said quickly as soon as he recovered, immeasurably grateful that she was so innocent. "We're not going to have any more fun! Ever! Never! At all! _Ever_!"

Kisa smiled, nodded, and the two continued down the path, one completely oblivious while the other contemplated the easiest way to kill a snake.

————————

Reviews are welcomed, even if it's just to tell you that it was terrible. (Because I fully agree, _and_ I need some flames to make s'mores with. Mm, s'mores…)


End file.
